There is some irony to be had in my title for today as I am currently writing this with a long skinny beanbag perched on top of my head and hanging down like dog ears in an attempt to sooth my aching face. (I don't know what it's actually called--it is usually used for necks, but I have placed it in various positions all over my face and head in the last week to find something like soothing relief for a few minutes).
But, I did several non-remarkable things today that felt very remarkable to me. First, I woke up after sleeping for over eight straight hours. Then, after a minor crying jag (because I wasn't well enough to go to Barney's niece's birthday party today) which probably should just be erased from historical records, I put on real clothes (rather than yoga pants), and I actually blow dried and fixed my hair for the first time in far too long. I decided makeup would just look silly though.
Then, I had a productive work morning while Barney and the kids were in Dallas enjoying the party. When they came home, I was very active in taking care of the kids, I went grocery shopping without assistance, and then I finally fixed the spaghetti dinner that has eluded me for weeks now.
By the time I finished cleaning up dinner, I knew that I had gone too far and done too much today. And, at first I was disappointed in the effect that it had on Barney--that is to say, not really any effect at all. But, then I realized that all that meant was that I had been successful--I gave Barney a normal day with a normal wife who could do normal things for the first time in seven days. It might not be much to comment on, and it is surely a sad topic for my 50th day of my project, but I honestly believe that it was appreciated. It has to get really old having a sickie in the house when you are healthy and nothing seems to bring respite to the sick person for very long. I'm hoping that by the end of this week, this whole episode will be nothing more than a memory not much worth thinking about.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Days 48 & 49 -- A Marathon Sickness and a TV Marathon
After another sleepless night on Friday, which culminated in a 3:00am call to the night nurse at my Obgyn's office, I knew that I was not going to recover as quickly as I hoped. I am proud to say that I did not actually say any of the rather foul things that crossed through my head when talking to the night nurse, who may or may not have been a 15 year old candy striper with a very poor attitude. Let me just say that if a pregnant woman is calling you at 3:00am, it's because she's run out of any other options and would not ask you questions if she had found the answer anywhere else.
I woke up Saturday morning with less congestion but intense pain in my face from the sinus infection, particularly in the cheekbones and jaws. It basically feels like a hundred toothaches at once. I had to suck it up and lead a conference call, though it was blessedly short. I think they felt sorry for me based on my voice. After that point, I called my regular doctor and pled for more ideas for things to do to relieve the pain and speed up the recovery process, and he said that I basically have to be patient. So, my mom really stepped up for me by coming and picking up the kids. While Barney was doing a great job watching them, it is very hard to be really sick in front of your kids. First, they don't understand why you can't play and hold them like normal, and second, seeing you feel bad makes them feel scared. When they left, I went straight to bed and stayed there for five hours, alternating between dozing and reading a little bit. I didn't work or even turn on my computer. About 5:30, I got up with the intention of eating some dinner, doing a minimal amount of work, and heading back to bed.
But at this point, I realized that Barney was really at loose ends. He was caught up on work, had no kids to watch, and didn't want to go out with friends because he wanted to be here for me (despite sincere encouragement on my part). So, I agreed to watch some movie that I didn't have much interest in that we've had from Netflix for several weeks. About 20 minutes in, we gave it up as the worst film ever. Barney still wanted to watch something though, so he started to peruse our instant watch library and found a television show called Kidnapped that he'd always wanted to see. It only ran one season back in 2006. I agreed to try one out. Between 8:00pm last night and 2:00pm this afternoon, we watched all 13 episodes. It was really fun, and it allowed me to rest in bed while also doing something with Barney that he wanted to do. It was a perfect solution, and it just sort of fell into my lap. The downside is that I am now (and seemingly perpetually these days) further behind in my work than I would like to be. But that seems par for the course these days.
I just also want to state for the record that as soon as I am well, I am going to have to do something to make myself have feminine appeal again--poor Barney has seen me with either nose strips or tissue stuffed up my nose, unfixed hair, in pajamas, and constantly either coughing up gook or blowing my nose for six days now. Maybe my goal for tomorrow can just simply be to try to be something resembling pretty for him. Also, maybe I should try to cook some food--that seems a bit over-zealous though ;)
I woke up Saturday morning with less congestion but intense pain in my face from the sinus infection, particularly in the cheekbones and jaws. It basically feels like a hundred toothaches at once. I had to suck it up and lead a conference call, though it was blessedly short. I think they felt sorry for me based on my voice. After that point, I called my regular doctor and pled for more ideas for things to do to relieve the pain and speed up the recovery process, and he said that I basically have to be patient. So, my mom really stepped up for me by coming and picking up the kids. While Barney was doing a great job watching them, it is very hard to be really sick in front of your kids. First, they don't understand why you can't play and hold them like normal, and second, seeing you feel bad makes them feel scared. When they left, I went straight to bed and stayed there for five hours, alternating between dozing and reading a little bit. I didn't work or even turn on my computer. About 5:30, I got up with the intention of eating some dinner, doing a minimal amount of work, and heading back to bed.
But at this point, I realized that Barney was really at loose ends. He was caught up on work, had no kids to watch, and didn't want to go out with friends because he wanted to be here for me (despite sincere encouragement on my part). So, I agreed to watch some movie that I didn't have much interest in that we've had from Netflix for several weeks. About 20 minutes in, we gave it up as the worst film ever. Barney still wanted to watch something though, so he started to peruse our instant watch library and found a television show called Kidnapped that he'd always wanted to see. It only ran one season back in 2006. I agreed to try one out. Between 8:00pm last night and 2:00pm this afternoon, we watched all 13 episodes. It was really fun, and it allowed me to rest in bed while also doing something with Barney that he wanted to do. It was a perfect solution, and it just sort of fell into my lap. The downside is that I am now (and seemingly perpetually these days) further behind in my work than I would like to be. But that seems par for the course these days.
I just also want to state for the record that as soon as I am well, I am going to have to do something to make myself have feminine appeal again--poor Barney has seen me with either nose strips or tissue stuffed up my nose, unfixed hair, in pajamas, and constantly either coughing up gook or blowing my nose for six days now. Maybe my goal for tomorrow can just simply be to try to be something resembling pretty for him. Also, maybe I should try to cook some food--that seems a bit over-zealous though ;)
Friday, January 28, 2011
Days 46 & 47-- Just Trying to See the Other Side
I don't want to dwell on sickness, since that is what this blog has been about for roughly the past 10 days. But, the inescapable fact is that someone in this house has been sick for that many days, and it has greatly interrupted our lives and plans. To be more specific and more current, the sick person has been me since Tuesday. I am very happy that the other three are recovered, but for whatever reason, the road to recovery has been much longer for me. I finally broke down yesterday and went to see my general practioner. I initially called my Obgyn, but he was out for the day and merely called in a prescription for something that I felt was not going to be overly helpful. So, I went to my regular doc, who gave me a steriod shot, a breathing treatment, and penicillin. Today, I am something like better, though if I had not experienced yesterday, I would have felt that today was about as bad as it could get.
As such, Barney has been facing a tedious road these last few days. His life basically consists of taking care of the kids, and when he can, taking care of me. My parents very thoughtfully offered to take the kids for a day or so to give us a rest, but Barney said no. I think he is seeing this as a test of himself as a parent and a husband somehow and to accept outside help would be admitting that he can't do it. And, I have to admit that he really is doing great. If there was ever a time to show him deliberate acts of love, right now is it. The problem is that I'm too sick to do much. I can't drive, can't cook, can't even eat. He wanted tacos for lunch, and I was all for the idea. But, he didn't want to eat tacos by himself, and even my offer to go with him was not what he wanted. All I had to do to make him happy was eat a taco, but I couldn't do it.
So, tonight, I insisted that he order a pizza, Hawaiian style, for dinner tonight, and then I watched a movie with him (Knight and Day, cute enough). He's already conked out in bed, so I am taking the late shift to wake George for his last potty break of the night sometime between 11:00 and midnight. I don't mind because sleeping is the worst part of the ordeal--I just get more stopped up and less capable of breathing when I try to sleep.
I want to end on some sort of pithy or thoughtful note, but what can I say? I'm pregnant, I'm sick, I'm sick of being sick. If there's a lesson to be learned here, I'm too close to the situation to see it yet. So, I will just sign off with one last wishful thought of being better tomorrow and having the opportunity to write about something other than being sick.
As such, Barney has been facing a tedious road these last few days. His life basically consists of taking care of the kids, and when he can, taking care of me. My parents very thoughtfully offered to take the kids for a day or so to give us a rest, but Barney said no. I think he is seeing this as a test of himself as a parent and a husband somehow and to accept outside help would be admitting that he can't do it. And, I have to admit that he really is doing great. If there was ever a time to show him deliberate acts of love, right now is it. The problem is that I'm too sick to do much. I can't drive, can't cook, can't even eat. He wanted tacos for lunch, and I was all for the idea. But, he didn't want to eat tacos by himself, and even my offer to go with him was not what he wanted. All I had to do to make him happy was eat a taco, but I couldn't do it.
So, tonight, I insisted that he order a pizza, Hawaiian style, for dinner tonight, and then I watched a movie with him (Knight and Day, cute enough). He's already conked out in bed, so I am taking the late shift to wake George for his last potty break of the night sometime between 11:00 and midnight. I don't mind because sleeping is the worst part of the ordeal--I just get more stopped up and less capable of breathing when I try to sleep.
I want to end on some sort of pithy or thoughtful note, but what can I say? I'm pregnant, I'm sick, I'm sick of being sick. If there's a lesson to be learned here, I'm too close to the situation to see it yet. So, I will just sign off with one last wishful thought of being better tomorrow and having the opportunity to write about something other than being sick.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Day 46--Focusing on the Good Things
This evening, I'm going to focus on the positive, taking a page from my sweetheart, who has always been good at that.
The good news is that since I was unable to ever fall asleep last night due to sinus pain and congestion, I was able to get all of my required work for the day done before 6:00am and was even able to catch up on my grading.
The good news is that I was also able to work on a filing project that I was woefully behind on as well last night.
The good news is that it didn't matter that the kids woke up early because I was up anyway.
The good news is that I had plenty of time to get Barney's special breakfast made before he got up at 8:30.
The good news is that he loved my trip idea and the portfolio I put together about it. He seemed to really appreciate my 35 Reason Why I Love Him.
The good news is that since the constant pain meant sleep wasn't an option, we went to the burger place and the movie anyway. (highly recommend The King's Speech by the way).
The good news is that since theatres are dark, no one could see the tissues I stuffed up each nostril.
The good news is that both kids had great days at school and then came home to quickly eat a good dinner apiece.
The good news is that they were so impatient for birthday cake that we ate it before the grownup dinner, so when I was then too worn down to make dinner, I didn't have to worry about no birthday cake time on Barney's birthday.
The good news is that Barney could tell that I wasn't up for cooking or eating dinner and so postponed his birthday dinner of his own initiative.
The good news is that he seemed to have felt loved and appreciated today. Which is good, because he is.
The good news is that since I was unable to ever fall asleep last night due to sinus pain and congestion, I was able to get all of my required work for the day done before 6:00am and was even able to catch up on my grading.
The good news is that I was also able to work on a filing project that I was woefully behind on as well last night.
The good news is that it didn't matter that the kids woke up early because I was up anyway.
The good news is that I had plenty of time to get Barney's special breakfast made before he got up at 8:30.
The good news is that he loved my trip idea and the portfolio I put together about it. He seemed to really appreciate my 35 Reason Why I Love Him.
The good news is that since the constant pain meant sleep wasn't an option, we went to the burger place and the movie anyway. (highly recommend The King's Speech by the way).
The good news is that since theatres are dark, no one could see the tissues I stuffed up each nostril.
The good news is that both kids had great days at school and then came home to quickly eat a good dinner apiece.
The good news is that they were so impatient for birthday cake that we ate it before the grownup dinner, so when I was then too worn down to make dinner, I didn't have to worry about no birthday cake time on Barney's birthday.
The good news is that Barney could tell that I wasn't up for cooking or eating dinner and so postponed his birthday dinner of his own initiative.
The good news is that he seemed to have felt loved and appreciated today. Which is good, because he is.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Day 45--You Win Universe
Guess who woke up sick again this morning??? Pick me. I did!! Ugh. Olivia and I are the two worst people to get an upper respiratory infection because children under two and pregnant women cannot take cold and sinus medication. So, we are just making do. Luckily though, George seems to be pretty much back to his normal self, and so does Barney. That meant that only Olivia stayed home with us today, and the good news for me is that I am so stopped up that I absolutely cannot smell her dirty diapers. The bad news for Barney is that it meant he ended up discovering and dealing with all of them today.
I was supposed to get a much-needed haircut today, and I had allotted three hours for that privilege. The good news is that when I cancelled the cut, it gave me more time to deal with Barney's birthday preparations. The bad news is that my hair still looks awful.
I've managed today to make Barney's birthday cake and a couple of other food items for tomorrow, take care of his birthday presents (basically a book on New Orleans and a portfolio I created about our trip), and get through hosting a conference call despite sniffling the entire time I talked. I count it a successful win against this wretched week.
I made Barney a card today with a list of 35 things that I love about him (because he's turning 35), which is my gift to him for today. However, in an effort to make tomorrow slightly more special, I decided not to give it to him until tomorrow. It still counts though, right?
I was in bed by 11:00 last night, and I am hoping for a repeat performance on that count. Tomorrow is a big day--pancakes and sausage balls for breakfast, a new burger place for lunch (be still my heart!), a movie matinee, and a steak dinner at home followed by birthday cake and presents. And, somewhere in there I will be sure to get some work done, I hope. Of course, all of this pre-supposes that Olivia will be well enough to go to school (and unless we take on a third virus in a row, she should be), and that I am well enough to get out and about (a somewhat shakier proposition). But, I believe in making birthdays special no matter what, so I am determined to go have the healthiest sleep in the world right now so that I will be up and perky and chipper and ready to make Barney's day very special (yes, I know that sleep cannot actually transform me into someone else, but I can at least do my best impression of perky and chipper).
I was supposed to get a much-needed haircut today, and I had allotted three hours for that privilege. The good news is that when I cancelled the cut, it gave me more time to deal with Barney's birthday preparations. The bad news is that my hair still looks awful.
I've managed today to make Barney's birthday cake and a couple of other food items for tomorrow, take care of his birthday presents (basically a book on New Orleans and a portfolio I created about our trip), and get through hosting a conference call despite sniffling the entire time I talked. I count it a successful win against this wretched week.
I made Barney a card today with a list of 35 things that I love about him (because he's turning 35), which is my gift to him for today. However, in an effort to make tomorrow slightly more special, I decided not to give it to him until tomorrow. It still counts though, right?
I was in bed by 11:00 last night, and I am hoping for a repeat performance on that count. Tomorrow is a big day--pancakes and sausage balls for breakfast, a new burger place for lunch (be still my heart!), a movie matinee, and a steak dinner at home followed by birthday cake and presents. And, somewhere in there I will be sure to get some work done, I hope. Of course, all of this pre-supposes that Olivia will be well enough to go to school (and unless we take on a third virus in a row, she should be), and that I am well enough to get out and about (a somewhat shakier proposition). But, I believe in making birthdays special no matter what, so I am determined to go have the healthiest sleep in the world right now so that I will be up and perky and chipper and ready to make Barney's day very special (yes, I know that sleep cannot actually transform me into someone else, but I can at least do my best impression of perky and chipper).
Monday, January 24, 2011
Day 44--And the Fun Continues
We woke up this morning to Olivia burning up with fever and having trouble breathing. So, we first called daycare to let them know that both children would be staying home today. Then, we made an appointment for her to go see the doctor. They diagnosed her as having an upper respiratory infection that is entirely separate from the stomach virus we all are getting over. And, to make things more fun, the upper respiratory infection has caused an ear infection. So, we are still very much in crisis mode at our house. But, George did seem to be on the mend today, as he was able to keep milk down, and we had relatively few issues with him being sick.
Both Barney and I are pretty well worn out at this point, both physically and emotionally. It feels like we are operating in survival mode, and both of us are fighting a tendency to be sharp towards one another when communicating, even though we aren't fighting. So, today was definitely a day to be more deliberate in my behavior towards him. I did this first and foremost by letting go when he was sharp with me, knowing that there was nothing really behind it. But, we both could use a pick-me-up at this point, so when I went to the pharmacy today, I also picked up a new kind of candy bar that I thought he might like and put it in the fridge for him to find. Then, when he mentioned a favorite restaurant tonight that is on my "Absolutely Not" list during pregnancy, I agreed to it.
Tomorrow is my last day to prepare for his birthday, and I have so much to do, but I honestly think that the best thing I could do for him and myself is to go to bed early tonight, so that is my number one goal at this point. Hopefully when you hear from me tomorrow, I will be more coherent and rested. We shall see.
Both Barney and I are pretty well worn out at this point, both physically and emotionally. It feels like we are operating in survival mode, and both of us are fighting a tendency to be sharp towards one another when communicating, even though we aren't fighting. So, today was definitely a day to be more deliberate in my behavior towards him. I did this first and foremost by letting go when he was sharp with me, knowing that there was nothing really behind it. But, we both could use a pick-me-up at this point, so when I went to the pharmacy today, I also picked up a new kind of candy bar that I thought he might like and put it in the fridge for him to find. Then, when he mentioned a favorite restaurant tonight that is on my "Absolutely Not" list during pregnancy, I agreed to it.
Tomorrow is my last day to prepare for his birthday, and I have so much to do, but I honestly think that the best thing I could do for him and myself is to go to bed early tonight, so that is my number one goal at this point. Hopefully when you hear from me tomorrow, I will be more coherent and rested. We shall see.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Days 42 & 43--A Looooong Weekend
I was going to be shocked if it didn't happen--and of course it did. I woke up yesterday morning sick as a dog. Unfortunately, none of the other three were really in any better shape than I was. I'm not even sure how we managed to get through the day, except that we all took turns napping as possible between cleaning up sick messes and watching way too much Curious George. Unfortunately, Olivia is not just facing stomach upset but also congestion, which has proved significant, because she is not sleeping well. I was up at 6:00am with her yesterday (when normal wake up time is around 7:30am), and she did not sleep for more than 45 minutes at a stretch yesterday. George on the other hand had multiple really good naps, which helped us all out a lot. Barney really stepped up yesterday, which was good, because I couldn't get out of bed between 9:00am-noon and then fell back asleep on the couch at 6:30 last night for an hour.
So, today it was my turn to step up. I got to sleep in until 8:00, which was nice, but once I got up, Barney went back to sleep for about an hour and a half. During that time, there were three sick episodes to deal with. I also started trying to clean up the house some--no easy task, in part because I'm still not really well and in part because the house is in such bad shape. Let me just illustrate one small sample of things we had to deal with this weekend--at one point today, George decided to play hide and seek by hiding in the cabinet under the stairs, where he proceeded to have an accident all over everything. When I say the house is a nightmare, that's not really an exaggeration. I've done seven loads of laundry today and will be washing all beds tomorrow. I thought that today would be the recovery day, but it really wasn't. We know for sure that George will be staying home tomorrow with us, and we will decide for sure about Olivia in the morning.
I'm not sure either of us will ever really catch up on work--and I really wanted to take this Wednesday off because it's Barney's birthday. I have plans for a homemade breakfast, lunch out, a movie matinee, and a home cooked dinner. Of course, that necessitates a trip to the grocery store, which I haven't been able to take the last three days both for obvious reasons and because I haven't managed to put on anything but a new set of PJs each day. We are out of just about everything except the dairy foods that we can't eat at this point. Shopping's a must for tomorrow.
So, in terms of this project, I didn't really have anything preset yesterday, as it was a huge team effort just to get through the day. Tonight though, I'm going to write Barney a thank you note to put under his pillow so that he knows that I am both aware of how great he was this weekend and that I really appreciate it.
So, today it was my turn to step up. I got to sleep in until 8:00, which was nice, but once I got up, Barney went back to sleep for about an hour and a half. During that time, there were three sick episodes to deal with. I also started trying to clean up the house some--no easy task, in part because I'm still not really well and in part because the house is in such bad shape. Let me just illustrate one small sample of things we had to deal with this weekend--at one point today, George decided to play hide and seek by hiding in the cabinet under the stairs, where he proceeded to have an accident all over everything. When I say the house is a nightmare, that's not really an exaggeration. I've done seven loads of laundry today and will be washing all beds tomorrow. I thought that today would be the recovery day, but it really wasn't. We know for sure that George will be staying home tomorrow with us, and we will decide for sure about Olivia in the morning.
I'm not sure either of us will ever really catch up on work--and I really wanted to take this Wednesday off because it's Barney's birthday. I have plans for a homemade breakfast, lunch out, a movie matinee, and a home cooked dinner. Of course, that necessitates a trip to the grocery store, which I haven't been able to take the last three days both for obvious reasons and because I haven't managed to put on anything but a new set of PJs each day. We are out of just about everything except the dairy foods that we can't eat at this point. Shopping's a must for tomorrow.
So, in terms of this project, I didn't really have anything preset yesterday, as it was a huge team effort just to get through the day. Tonight though, I'm going to write Barney a thank you note to put under his pillow so that he knows that I am both aware of how great he was this weekend and that I really appreciate it.
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