Day 105--Aftermath of the Aftermath of the Fight

The fight itself was not really a big deal in terms of big picture things--it was a squabble indistinguishable from countless squabbles that we have had in the past, but the aftermath has been epic.  I thought for sure things would be fine in the morning, and in large part, they were moving that way.  I let Barney sleep as late as he wanted, preparing the kids for school and getting ready to take them myself (usually Barney does the morning run).  But, the kids were very unsettled at the change of routine, and Barney picked up on it and decided to come with us at the last minute.  Still, things were going okay, but then at almost noon, we had our newest crisis hit our move.

We got an amended contract from the builder that we thought was saying that he would not fix the items found in the inspection if we moved in early and that would force us to cough up a large deposit more quickly than we anticipated having to do if we could not close on time.  Since our lender seems to be in no hurry whatsoever, we were pretty panicked.  While our realtor worked on talking to the builder, we spent several hours working on even more paperwork for the lender.  We both missed out on important work time, and we skipped lunch altogether.

We think that we have it all resolved now, as we have learned that the builder was not referencing inspection items but some item about a tardy survey clause.  And, he has verbally agreed to postpone the final date though we haven't seen it in writing.  Our lender was also cautiously optimistic about closing very soon.  We shall see.

But, the bottom line is that the pressure mounted in a big way today, and so instead of mending our fight, it seemed to only make things worse.  I tried to just be patient with Barney lashing out at me, knowing that he felt I was doing the same, even if I didn't ever intend to or feel like I was.  Finally though, things came to a head and we ended up having to have a "talk."  These are so painful in our house because Barney hates them so much.  And, this instance was no different.

I think...at least I hope....that ultimately the air cleared some, and we were both able to recognize that in order to survive this week, we have to work as a team.  While I am not heading to bed feeling good about where I am in terms of packing, I do at least feel better about how things will be for Barney and I tomorrow.