Day 98--The Big Sleep

So much for trying to live in the present.  Yesterday was a haze of busyness from breakfast with Barney's mom to a very late start to work to Barney's sister's visit to help us pack (an incredibly sweet gesture), to it being the normal busy Monday that we see each day.

I recently read a book about one woman's quest to connect with God and to feel His presence in her life.  While she is Jewish, there were many things in the book that I related to.  One thing that I keep thinking about was a Buddhist woman who talked about finding zen despite being the active mother of six children and grandmother of many more.  Her constant daily activities precluded her from having the meditation time that most Buddhists apparently need to reach the state of peace and oneness that is a primary quest of Buddhism.  This woman found it by focusing only on each task at hand and giving it all of her attention--she called it "Stirring the pot mindfully."  I love that concept, but I have no idea how to put it into practice.  If I'm not planning things during my cook time, how will I know what I need to do next, and when will I make the plans that really are necessary?

Barney and I haven't had any real time to ourselves since Friday and our only partially successful date afternoon.  So, since we got so ahead in packing this weekend with the help of Barney's mom and sister, I thought that once the kids went to bed, we could skip packing and have some quality time together, even if it meant not catching up on all my work.  But, by 8:45, I was completely wiped out.  As soon as we put George to bed, I headed to the bath, which sometimes rejuvenates me a bit.  This time it didn't.  I was in bed and asleep by 9:45pm--three hours earlier than normal.

I could try to justify the decision to go to bed as something I did in part for Barney because when I become too sleep deprived, I get so much crankier.  But, it wasn't a decision that I really even consciously made.  It was just my body telling me that I needed sleep right NOW.

But, maybe it will allow me to bring my mind into better focus today to help me better excel at the required tasks and then to be able to turn all of my attention to Barney.  One goal for today is to come up with a plan for Wednesday--it is not only day 100 of this project, but it is also the day Barney will finish his MBA.  Despite what he claims, that is something to celebrate, and I intend to do just that.